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Monday, April 22

How To Overcome Setbacks

"What looks like a setback may actually be disguised as a setup for your come back" - Dr. Jacki

We've all experienced a setback at some time in our lives.  The best way I can describe it is when your life has been suddenly interrupted, and now you have to deal with an unexpected issue.  It may have been the end of a relationship, the loss of a job or opportunity, a financial loss, or some other unexpected  pause in your life, a pause you didn't anticipate.  During those seasons you may feel lost, confused, frustrated, and yes  even angry.   Yet in all of that seemingly negative swirl of emotions, there can be a positive side to a setback.  In fact, a setback can actually be a springboard to push you into your true purpose.

I think of a setback as a picture of a bow and arrow.  You know how a bow and arrow works.  You have to insert the arrow into the bow, pull back on it, then release so that the arrow can fly forward.  The further you pull the arrow back into the bow, the farther the arrow will fly once you release it.  More tension applied when you pull back causes the arrow to fly even farther, and much faster.

Life can feel that way sometimes.  Sometimes it feels like the pressure has been applied, and the tension is almost unbearable.  Setbacks can cause you to feel as if you have lost ground, or that you have been pulled backwards.  But keep in mind that the harder you are pulled back by life's circumstances, with the right attitude, and with the right frame of thinking, you can actually reach new heights, higher and farther than you would have, had you not experienced the tension that the setback caused.

Sometimes a door slammed in your face can create just the right amount of gushing wind needed to propel you into your destiny.

So how do you overcome a setback in your life?  How do you move forward in such a way that a setback becomes your stepping stone? 

  3 ways you can overcome a setback, and position yourself for a stonger than ever comeback.

1. Ask yourself this question, "What did I learn from this, and how did I contribute to it?"  You can't always control what happens in life, nor do you have any control over the actions of others.  The only person you have any real say so over is yourself.  Avoid the tendency to look for someone else to blame.  In blaming others you learn nothing.  Consider how you may have contributed to what happened, and then focus on how you can become a better person after having had that experience. 

2. Identify your available resources and support systems.  No one ever makes it alone.  When faced with setbacks, it's important to surround yourself with people, and reminders of the greatness that lies within you.  Encourage yourself.  Build on your strengths.  Accentuate the positive.  Remind yourself of all that's good about you, and of all of the wonderful qualities you possess.  You are worthy. You are valuable.  Your body is valuable.  Your mind is valuable.  Your dreams are valuable.  Make sure that you feed your spirit a steady dose of positivity.

3. Plan your come back.  You may have to sit on the sidelines for a little while, but that doesn't have to mean that you are out of the game.  If your setback is the area of a relationship, take the time you need to heal and work on you, so that when you are presented with the opportunity to love again, you can love better.  If your setback is in the area of a financial loss, take the time to develop a strategy for making sound financial decisions, it may be that you need to seek the help of a financial advisor.  If you've suffered a job loss set back, decide your best course of action in moving forward.  Brush up your resume and work your network. Or maybe consider that this may be an opportunity for you to go into a different field, maybe even own your own business.

Setbacks are life's way of getting our attention when we are moving too fast.  They come to cause us to pause, stop or re-evaluate the path we are on, so that we can make changes for the better.  There is life after a setback, and with the right perspective, you can actually come back better, stronger, and wiser than you were before the term "life interrupted" ever entered into your life's vocabulary.

Much success!
Dr. Jacki


Speaker, Writer, Teacher Coach - Dr. Jacki inspires and motivates in the areas of personal & professional development.

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